Wednesday, April 29, 2015

Gratitude Journal – Day 301 – April 29, 2015

On learning…
Searching in the dusty corners of my mind for words to write, I know I had a stack of them somewhere….. So I searched for learning and found that I have written about learning over 70 times in the past 300 days, and I am still learning.
Learn everything you can,
Anytime you can from
Anyone you can…
There will always come a time
You’ll be grateful you did
I’ve learned that when God closes a door, he opens a window. And over eight years ago I lost my job due to a big layoff and wrote my blog entry, ‘When Life gives you lemons….’ It was because of that door being closed, that myDarlin’ Robert Kenui Pope and I vowed not to let the day end poorly, and made plans to be married 30 days later. And we made the proverbial lemonade from the lemons that had been given to us.
When I heard her news today, I said a prayer as I’ve learned that placing our cares with our Lord is the best thing to do in any given situation. And the door that closed in the morning was followed only a few hours later with God slinging the window wide open with opportunity and a promising future.
Today, I am grateful for lessons learned over my lifetime, and know that each one makes me stronger and gives me a deeper understanding of the big picture of life and God’s plan.

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Tuesday, April 28, 2015

Gratitude Journal – Day 300 – April 28, 2015

Flying….
with angels… the sky was a perfect blue with clouds floating like whispers on the wind…. and we drove to be with them on their special day. He used to say that he wanted to be just like us when he grew up, and each time I would reassure him that there is the perfect someone for everyone, it just takes an open heart and patience.
And myDarlin’ arrived in my life quite unexpectedly, or at least from my perspective as our Lord had perfectly orchestrated every moment of our lives until that point, and continues even today and all or the days yet to be. From the beginning, we took many road trips, giving us time to continue our life’s dialogue that started with a four hour phone conversation the first time we ‘met’. Conversation, the dance of language shared between two people, is enriched with elements of laughter, tears, emotion and a splash of silence thrown in for good measure.
myDarlin’ had an infatuation with all things flying, birds, kites and airplanes and expressed his excitement in a childlike manner whenever he encountered them. As I look back over the photos from the day, many of which were taken by him I hear this song come over the radio and I know that he has added angels to his collection of favorite flying beings and things.
Where are you going, inside your mind
I guess were always living on borrowed time
Yes I will be here, to hold your hand
just close your eyes and sleep, I understand
You'll fly with angels above us all and I'll be here
to catch you if you fall
If others leave you, you know I'll stay
My dreams will whisper to you and guide your way
so sleep my darling - one kiss goodnight
another song awaits you with rising eyes
Tonight I am grateful for our Lords promise that we can fall asleep in his loving arms, and whether we wake here or in heaven – angels will sing of his promise of everlasting life. And I know that from the blue sky of that special day with friends, to the night sky filled with twinkling stars, from calm waters to turbulent waves, from a gentle breeze to the still night – that myDarlin’ Robert Kenui Pope is flying with angels telling me, ‘you should see the view from up here!’
‪

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Monday, April 27, 2015

Gratitude Journal – Day 299 – April 27, 2105

This little piggy….
went to market is what I automatically think of when I see myDarlin’s toes. I imagine his Mother counting to make sure he had ten fingers and ten toes, and know that she must have chuckled a when she saw those cute little toes. Those toes…. ticklish beyond reasoning. I love the memory of cutting his toe nails just to hear his uncontrollable belly laughs.
His toes spent the majority of his lifetime in the sand or wearing slippers, only wearing shoes when it was too cold to bear or socially unacceptable not to. And he ran on the beach with Elvis, with his friends, with his children, his grandchildren and me.
She sent a list to me, the step-mother, of photos to take of our son during his first visit to Atlanta. And on the list was one of their feet side by side, for she already knew what I was about to discover. They each had those cute little pudgy toes….
Those toes reached over that very morning in church to touch my feet as I had fallen earlier in the morning and had taken my slippers off to rest my feet. I remember thinking and writing about the path our feet had been leading us to for the past eleven years and wake to find that another year has almost passed without him.
Tonight I am grateful for all of the days and nights that myDarlin’ Robert Kenui Popewould reach over with his feet to nudge me and it was understood that our feet would carry us on this sandy journey we call life.

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Sunday, April 26, 2015

Gratitude Journal – Day 298 – April 26, 2015

Aruba…
I picked it up from the table, a license plate from Aruba circa 1998 and found myself transported back to 2003 standing in myDarlin’ Robert Kenui Pope's apartment. In the kitchen drawer was an envelope of photos, of the tropics and a scooter…. No selfies back in the day. Curiosity got the best of me and I asked him how this came to be. He had been awarded manager of the year, and the prize was a vacation for two at one of their properties. But yet there was no one in the photos….
Recovering from a failed relationship, he traveled alone… and a part of me felt sad for him. And he told me stories of reading books on the beach, renting a scooter and exploring the island, and getting to know the sushi chef very well as he ate sashimi every night. And in retrospect, this time allowed him to reflect on his life and recharge, for little did he know then that he was in for a whirlwind of love, music and fun in just a couple of months.
And we talked of Aruba being on our bucket list. And we would ride scooters, take photographs, sit at the sushi bar, play in the clear waters of the ocean, get sand in our toes and our hair (well, maybe just my hair), listen to the steel drum bands and end every day in each other’s arms.
I am grateful today for the dreams of tomorrow that we had yesterday. And who knows? Maybe I’ll travel to Aruba, spend my time writing on the beach, taking a scooter around the island to take photographs of tropical flowers and sit at the sushi bar every night. Only time will tell…..

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Gratitude Journal – Day 297 – April 25, 2015

Touches the soul….

is what music does to and for me, and I know that it was and is for myDarlin’ as well. And the weekend, not unlike those when myDarlin’ was with us, was filled with music and Ohana. From Wednesday to Sunday, I listened to so many wonderful friends play – even one who sang my song, or is it her song, or was it myDarlin’s song? For she wrote a song for me, co-authored by myDarlin’ long after he left us, and much to my surprise asked everyone to sing the chorus with her.
Sheri, sweet Sheri
Your smile lights us our days
You show us love is all you need
With grateful giving ways.
You write each day to share this love
With family and friends
Please take my picture Sheri
I want to see life through your lens
I am humbled by her kind words, and grateful that she has come into my life.
And we went to see him, this musician whom we had come to know as a photographer, quite talented at that. And in this funky, downtown listening room they sang as his father and family looked on. And I looked over to his father, well on in years and life’s experiences, as he watched his son with pride shining in his eyes. And they sang beautiful originals for the evening, sprinkled with one or two covers. This one particularly touched my soul.
When I die, don't cry for me
In my Father's arms, I'll be
And wounds this world left on my soul
Will all be healed and I'll be whole
Sun and moon will be replaced
With the light of Jesus' face
And I will be not be ashamed
For my Savior knows my name
It don't matter where you bury me
I'll be home and I'll be free
It don't matter where I lay
All my tears, be washed away
Gold and silver blind the eye
Temporary riches lie
Come and eat from Heaven's store
Come and drink and thirst no more
'Cos it don't matter where you bury me
I'll be home and I'll be free
It don't matter where I lay
All my tears, be washed away
So weep not from me, my friends
When my time below does end
For my life belongs to Him
Who will raise the dead again
It don't matter where you bury me
'Cos I'll be home and I'll be free
It don't matter where I lay
All my tears, be washed away
And I wept, tears of sorrow as I miss him so, mixed with tears of joy as I know that myDarlin’ is safe in our Saviors arms.
I am grateful myLord for the gift of your love and that of myDarlin’ Robert Kenui Pope. And even in the silence in the late hours of the night, the music he played fills my very being with peace and understanding.
‪#‎KeepLookingUp‬ ‪#‎MTWABP‬
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Saturday, April 25, 2015

Gratitude Journal – Day 296 – April 24, 2015

Moderation…
is the key, they say. (There we go again with the proverbial ‘they’) And while that rings true for many things in life; wine, food, speed, I present the case that it is not true with good works, happiness and gratitude. As I woke from a sleepy lullaby of rain on the window, I could hear myDarlin’ Robert Kenui Pope saying “This is going to be a great day!” and this song began to play in my head…
Rise up this mornin', smile to the risin' sun,
Three little birds by my doorstep
Singin' sweet songs of melodies pure and true,
Sayin', "This is my message to you"
Singin' "Don't worry about a thing, worry about a thing, oh!
Every little thing gonna be alright.”
Today, I challenge you – yes you – and me to:
- do good works, making a conscious effort to exceed mediocrity
- choose happiness, it’s contagious!
- be grateful for the simple things, not taking anything or anyone for granted
And while some things are better with moderation, don’t forget that giving 110%, being excessive, going above and beyond can fill your glass to half full when you thought it was empty.
Today, I look to the heavens and am filled with gratitude for the life that I have been blessed with, the journey I walked with myDarlin’, my Ohana and the possibilities that tomorrow brings.

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Friday, April 24, 2015

Gratitude Journal – Day 295 – April 23, 2015

Garbage Day…
comes around once a week whether you want it to or not. About now, you are scratching your head wondering where in the world this is going. Doesn’t everyone want to get rid of the garbage? In years not too long ago, our house was full, resulting in much daily garbage. Trash day couldn’t get here quickly enough as we needed to empty to make room for more….
And then there were the parties myDarlin’ Robert Kenui Pope and I hosted… We planned invitations, the music, the menu and yes – the garbage. In the rolodex of my memory, I can distinctly remember on day one of my summer vacation preparing for the party, pulling every trash can to the back yard. I was surrounded by a host of cans (none of which by the way were actual cans) and poured soap and bleach in each one before pulling the heavy garden hose across the grass to fill each one with water. And the sun beat down on my back, as the spray of water sent droplets of soapy bleach water through the air adding polka dots to the clothes I wore. And our kids strategically placed the trash cans throughout the deck, the house, the drive and yard after filling each with a stash of trash bags. And we were all on trash duty throughout the party, in between eating, laughing, playing, catching up with old friends, meeting new friends, listening to music and running through the yard. And for a good party, it often took two weeks to return to a normal state of garbage days.
And with today comes the trash of days gone by…. the toy three wheeler that once sat under the Christmas tree, now sits by the side of the road broken and neglected as children grow older and move on to different interests, the plastic picnic table where small children sat with their own to eat and laugh at our parties and the cracked cooler that once held a picnic lunch carried to the beach. And If this rubbish, as myDarlin’ called it, could talk I wonder what stories it would share with us; the excitement of a getting a new ‘owner’, the pleasure of a useful life and the sorrow of being used, broken, unwanted and discarded.
Today I am filled with gratitude for Garbage Day, as it represents a life well and fully lived. And after the party, we rested in each other’s arms and he said to me, ”We have a good life Baby” to which I replied, “Yes we do myDarlin”, then we both said to each other, “Did you remember to take the trash out?”

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Wednesday, April 22, 2015

Gratitude Journal – Day 294 – April 22, 2015

Pinky swears and country roads
filled the evening, along with laughter and wishes upon stars tied with a bow of music. And we gather, not only for the music which is a force that binds us, but because of the sense of community, of being an Ohana.
The oldest, the youngest and the middle of nine, yes – nine siblings made a pinky swear with her to sing together. Tonight was the night it came to pass and I felt especially honored to be a part of the moment; history in the making - all captured on film and video as they played, they sang and they laughed together. And they dedicated all of this to their Mother as a small token of the life she dedicated to them.
Country Roads take me home, to the place I belong…..
Hearing this song throws me back in time; a 16 year old girl sitting on the edge of her bed, Yamaha acoustic guitar in hand, classic country music book open to this page…. Country roads, take me home….And I still wonder what ever became of that guitar
The last time I saw him was at a gig myDarlin’ Robert Kenui Pope played with Kona, but had never heard him play. His last song, a Jiminy Cricket original reminiscent of ours and Pinocchio’s childhood days brought me back to years with myDarlin’.
When you wish upon a star
Makes no difference who you are
Anything your heart desires
Will come true.
If your heart is in your dream
No request is too extreme
When you wish upon a star
As dreamers do.
Fate is kind
She brings to those who love
The sweet fulfillment of
Their secret longing
Like a bolt out of the blue
Suddenly, it comes to you
When you wish upon a star
Your dreams come true
Tonight I am filled with gratitude because my dreams did come true as I found the love of my life, my soulmate in myDarlin’ and he in me. And we travel the country road that takes us home, to the place we belong – resting in the blessed assurance of life everlasting with our Savior.

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Tuesday, April 21, 2015

Gratitude Journal – Day 293 – April 21, 2015

Tie Dye & Guitars...
It was his first time back to the islands since before he could remember times on the beach with his Mom and Dad…and she (his Mom) gave me a list of photos to take, knowing that someday they would have more meaning than at the very moment they were taken. Who knew that day would come so quickly?
And on the list was to take him to the hospital where he was born. They joked and acted silly for the majority of the time, until I called the shot to be serious for even just a moment. This one’s for your Mom I said, and he stopped at the top of the stairs and smiled…
As they walked down the hill, I picture myDarlin’ Robert Kenui Pope climbing the stairs a little over sixteen years prior to this moment, excited beyond belief to see his newborn baby son at the same hospital. The present swirls into the past with the blink of an eye, and I am looking at the very same guitar t-shirt myDarlin’ is wearing in this photo finding its’ home in his son’s quilt.
This t-shirt found its’ way into myDarlin’s closet during a trip to Savannah a few years prior. He was so excited to find a tie dye shirt in the shape of a guitar, representing his love for music. And he wore this special t-shirt as we walked on the shores of the ocean on the east coast.
Today myLord, I am grateful to ‘connect the dots’, tying memories from the past to the present to the future. My hope is that he will always remember this day, standing with his Dad wearing this shirt with the hospital in the background, knowing the joy he felt welcoming his baby boy into the world. Malama pono…

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Monday, April 20, 2015

Gratitude Journal – Day 292 – April 20, 2015

Start by starting….
Reads the inspirational saying in a deck of many. start... stop… pause… relax…. the long journey begins here….
It is quiet, deafening silence in the midst of the music that gently fills this room. And the easy laughter that used to swirl about every day traveling from room to room only visits on occasion now, but is always welcomed with open arms.
We all start by starting to wipe the sleep from our eyes, looking around us to see our new reality. And I know that we are starting from a place much further along than many will ever reach; a place of understanding, of God’s love, of Aloha.
I close my eyes as an instrumental version of Stairway to Heaven floats towards me and imagine we are back on the beaches of Hawaii. The waves lightly crash upon the shore reaching for our feet, then pulling back to the ocean as if beckoning us to join in the spirit filled waters. And we throw our leis into the ocean as a promise that we will return one day to the land of your childhood, the land your soul longs for.
And I will continue to write myDarlin’ Robert Kenui Pope, of the stories you shared with me, of the love you had for our children, our Ohana, of our love, of music, of laughter, of traditions old and new, of fishing and swimming in the ocean, of late nights talking until we fell asleep in each other’s arms. (Well, OK – I fell asleep and you were still playing Candy Crush and watching the history channel)
In the small hours of the darkness that fills the night, I am filled with gratitude as His love and light fills my soul. Aloha myDarlin’.
‪


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Sunday, April 19, 2015

Gratitude Journal - Day 291 – April 19, 2015

A baker’s dozen…
delivered in laundry baskets? And there they were all neatly folded in the baskets along with bags of left over fabric. Six months of her life spent getting to know our Ohana and more specifically myDarlin’ Robert Kenui Pope better, shirt by shirt. She remarked today about seeing the photo of him I posted just this morning wearing the Cheech and Chong t-shirt with our grandson at Waffle House, for she had just put it in one of the quilts.
And when the baskets were all gone from her living room, she looked almost sad for a bit as the quilts that had become a part of her life were now gone. And they will find their homes with our children, grandsons, his sister and me; heirlooms that will be passed down with love and stories for generations to come.
Each square on each quilt tells a story and it will be my project in the coming weeks and months to capture the stories as best I can through photos and words of love, laughter and aloha. And on this Sunday before the work week begins, I can still hear myDarlin’ saying, ‘thank you baby for doing my laundry’ as I hung his t-shirts, Aloha shirts and Chef’s jackets on hangers organized by color.
Dear Lord, I am grateful tonight for the privilege of sharing my life with myDarlin, for it was you that brought us together. And I am grateful for the serendipity of meeting Dawn as you knew that she would help to stitch the pieces of our lives together. As I cover myself in my quilt of well-worn aloha and t-shirts, I know that I am wrapped in his love for the remainder of my days on this big blue and green ball we call home. Mahalo nui my Lord.

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Gratitude Journal – Day 290 – April 18, 2015

Friends….
(click here to read Facebook comments)
cherished members of our Ohana. Every time I pick up the pen, ahem, I mean get out the keyboard to write my gratitude journal, I search key words to ensure I am not duplicating a previous entry. Ironically, when I choose the word ‘friend’, there are over 200 entries. Is that too many or not nearly enough? I say the later…
And so, I write of friends and family; connections who connect us with what is important in life. So what is really important in life? Reflections reveal that it is and has always been family, friends and the experiences we have along life’s journey. And I am sorrowful for those in pursuit of only the material things in life for they only have true meaning when made a part of an experience with loved ones.
And my day, April 18th, was filled with girlfriends, my Ohana… many of which it has been too long since we got to relax and spend time with.
- I drank coffee in jammies in the early morning talking with her and lost track of time
- I drank a lemon-pear martini with Seesters in the afternoon and laughed until my side hurt
- I drank Chianti with the Fab Five in the evening at her house and took a grainy selfie of us
Experiences filled my cup yesterday, and so I write this morning to capture all that has been, that is and that will be. We walked down the road, bustling with others out for the day, and slipped into a shop filled with treasures. And it caught my eye, from under the glass – a unique ring handcrafted in Spain.
Today, as I place my hand on the steering wheel of life, I am filled with gratitude that the sphere (me) is surrounded and held in place by the love of myLord, myDarlin’ Robert Kenui Pope and my Ohana.
‪#‎Friends‬ ‪#‎LoveisAllYouNeed‬ ‪#‎KeepLookingUp‬

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Gratitude Journal – Day 289 – April 17, 2015

Forgiveness
When one makes a promise to oneself, and doesn’t follow through, does it really matter? Take a step back, evaluate, put things into perspective... My promise to myself is to document through a gratitude journal, my daily thoughts and reflections on all that I have to be grateful for. So I write… of significant moments, and others that are quite ordinary at first glance.
And today I forgive myself for not documenting my gratitude these past couple of days, and vow to turn in my self-assignment today. One may ask why? Why not just pick up with today and move on? And my question would be, is not every day that has been given to us a gift worth remembering, and further more – sharing?
Our seats were toward the back, and we were content just to be there – to hear his music that was the backdrop for much of our younger days. For part of the beauty of music is that it permeates the atmosphere regardless of where one sits in life.
And then the call came in… an opportunity to sit right up front, just a couple of rows back from the stage. From here, one can see everything, not just what they put on the big screen, what ‘they’ (you know, the proverbial they ) want you to see.
So it is with gratitude that I sit in the front row of my life, cherishing the ability to choose what to focus on, and I jot notes of gratitude so as to not let a single moment slip away like a raindrop off of a leaf onto the ground. And as I pause for one more moment, I think of words myDarlin’ Robert Kenui Popesaid to me what seems like just yesterday, “You should see the view from up here.”

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Thursday, April 16, 2015

Gratitude Journal – Day 288 – April 16, 2015

The next chapter…
what will you write in yours? I wrote this just a year prior and posted it to myDarlin’s wall on Facebook. For you see, we were celebrating his clean bill of health and had every reason to look forward to thousands of days in each other’s arms. And we gave thanks for the blessings in our lives and looked forward to a trip back to his home in Hawaii…
And two years prior, we celebrated a successful six week checkup, and myDarlin’ Robert Kenui Pope graduated’ from riding in the back seat back into the driver’s seat. We visited his work family and I thought to myself that I truly knew what it was like to be in the presence of a rock star as everyone gathered round him. And we gave thanks for the blessings in our lives and looked forward to our trip to Hawaii for his daughter’s wedding….
A little over twelve years ago, we met and began the journey of a lifetime, a new chapter in both of our lives. The joy came in building our timeless love based on years of life experiences, vowing to cherish each other, our love and our Ohana. And while in Central Park, I had a street vendor make a painting for myDarlin’ that reads (in Kanji) “I always knew that I would find you.” And we gave thanks for the blessings in our lives and looked forward to whatever the future held for us.
And a song plays in my mind. It came to be long before we ever met, from a place that already knew we would meet; the future meets the present.
Oh once in your life you find someone
Who will turn your world around
Bring you up when you're feelin' down
Yeah nothin' could change what you mean to me
Oh there's lots that I could say
But just hold me now
'Cause our love will light the way
And baby, you're all that I want
When you're lyin' here in my arms
I'm findin' it hard to believe
We're in heaven….
Today I am faced with turning another page in the book of life and can’t help but think that we weren’t done writing yet myDarlin’. And even though it really felt like heaven here on earth, I know that you have moved beyond earthly constraints and are rejoicing in heaven as you celebrate your final chapter, playing in God’s House Band.
I am grateful that myLord sent myDarlin’ to be my co-author in writing the best chapter in my life. And as I begin to write the next chapter in my life, our love will light the way.

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Gratitude Journal – Day 287 – April 15, 2015

Change….
is inevitable, sometimes for the best, sometimes not, but change always tests our spirit. As I look around the room this evening at friends from all walks of life, I realize that we all face challenges on a daily basis and are on the journey called life. And even though circumstances may be similar, we all travel on this journey differently based on who we are, what we believe and our life’s experiences.
We come to watering stations along our journey to help refresh us and give us strength to make it through the next leg of the journey. You’ll recognize the faces as they:
- cheer you on with a spirit lift
- give you water, the very essence of life
- offer you fruit, the energy your body needs to make it through to the end
And as we grow stronger, day by day we will find ourselves not only stopping at the watering station for strength, but manning the station to help others along in their journey. And thus the cycle begins for whatever we give with good intentions will come back to us ten-fold and even more.
Today I am grateful that as I walk through one of the most difficult journeys of my life missing myDarlin' Robert Kenui Pope, that God and our Ohana have been there for me at the watering station to give me strength to persevere. And just as it was given to me, I will pass it on to you my friend, as you travel this journey called life.

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Wednesday, April 15, 2015

Gratitude Journal – Day 286 – April 14, 2015

His side….
of the bed. From the beginning, he claimed his side of the bed and for the longest time she never questioned why. 
- Perhaps it was because he like sleeping on his right side
- Perhaps it was the convenience of being near the door
- Perhaps it was that he didn’t want to wake her as he left for work in the wee hours before the break of dawn
Years later, she finally asked and found the answer to be quite simple, yet intriguing as it was more than a preference, it was instinct. For this gentle soul, the kindest man one could hope to meet was also a fierce protector.
- Protectors instinctively sleep near the door so that no one can get to their loved ones without going through them first.
- Protectors sit with their back to the wall whenever possible in order to see everything that is going on, always ready to take action
And now that he is gone, she lies on his side of the bed and still feels protected as his presence lingers and wraps her in a blanket of love.
I am grateful myLord for the protection that you give to my heart, my soul, my very being every day. myDarlin’ Robert Kenui Pope until we are together again, I will rest on your side.

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Monday, April 13, 2015

Gratitude Journal – Day 285 – April 13, 2015

Tradition…
most are good, right? Maybe so, maybe not… As I review the Timehop, II see a recurring theme during the days immediately before the dreaded April 15th, as in I’m still working on it. Tonight as I sat down at the computer, I paused to remember the many years gone by and the laughs that we shared while preparing our taxes.
Funny how preparing taxes is ranking right up there with holidays and events. For this year is the beginning and the end; first time I will file with you not here by my side, and the last time that I will ever file a joint return with you myDarlin’ Robert Kenui Pope. I close my eyes and think back to last year, we’re both sitting in bright yellow Naugahyde chairs at our matching desks laughing and carrying on, knowing that we will reward ourselves for making it through by going to dinner afterward. (That is if we had any $$ left, and ‘whew!’ we did – even if just barely)
Before I hit submit, I open my eyes only to realize that you have taken your place in the heavens flying with the angels. And my laptop screensaver is the Acceptance photo that God gave to us only a year prior; except for tonight there is something strange about it. I can hardly believe my eyes as I look for the source of the sunlight that has spilled light upon the screen, but it is a rainy day and there is no sun streaming through the window. I think to myself, it must be the light of the room and so I turn off the lights… the rays are still there. I move the draperies on the window looking for movement, they’re still there…. I take a photo, thinking that perhaps it’s just my imagination – still there. I walk to the living room to look at the large print of the photo and it is not there, and then I stop to ask myself why I doubt the rays of light, of hope, of acceptance and I say out loud, thank you myDarlin’ for the sign.
And just as I profess my belief that the ray of light in the photo is real, I walk back over to my laptop and it is gone. Tonight I am filled with gratitude that even as I approach this and other challenging times in my life, you are myAngel, a ray of hope, of light, of love that will carry me through the days of my life. And with faith and trust in the Lord, I will continue my walk until I am with you once again.

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Sunday, April 12, 2015

Gratitude Journal – Day 284 – April 12, 2015

Labor of love…
As she finishes the last few stitches of my quilt and pulls it off of the long arm, she smiles and sends me a note to let me know she is done. Our lives are forever connected through the thirteen quilts that she made for our Ohana. And each one of the shirts was chosen by one of us, his children, his grandchildren, his sister and me, his wife to represent memories of our life with him. And just as I washed each one of the shirts over the years, and hung them on the rack by color – she carefully cut each and arranged the colors in works of art and love knowing that they will each soon wrap us in love and memories of times gone by.
Today I am filled with gratitude for this angel, who God brought into our life to help keep myDarlin’ Robert Kenui Pope's memory alive for generations to come. Mahalo nui Dawn.

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Saturday, April 11, 2015

Gratitude Journal – Day 283 – April 11, 2015

Inspiration…
where does it come from? How do you decide what to write about every day? Oh, that’s easy I replied. All I have to do is to look back at a photograph or at a note that I took during the day when a memory or thought hits me. Speaking of something hitting me, ‘How’d you like a Hawaiian punch?’ That just came out of nowhere…. or did it? myDarlin’ Robert Kenui Pope loved his Hawaiian punch t-shirt before March 4th, but even more afterwards as it was one of the very soft shirts against his healing wound.
The letters on many of the keys of the laptop are almost gone, and even though I cannot see them anymore I know that they are still there. And it reminds me that even though you are not here with me tonight or tomorrow, you are always with me. I take a deep breath that goes past my lungs and into my heart. You fill it with love, and as tempting as it is to keep it all to myself, I exhale and your Aloha flows back into the atmosphere myDarlin’. For when you walked with us and now as you now walk with our Lord, you do not ‘belong’ to anyone – but to everyone.
I think about what I am grateful for today and so many things come to me; time with my sister, my friends, my Ohana. And most of all today, as I look up to the heavens, I am grateful that your memory is like the soft shirt against our healing wound of missing you.

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Gratitude Journal – Day 282 – April 10, 2015

The couch….
seems to have a mystical power over me, as if running a hand gently over my eyes and sending me to a land of dreams. I hear her talking to me and struggle to focus but unwillingly yield to slumber. I open my eyes…. all lights on, phone and glasses fallen to the floor and I wonder where my sister has gone before I realize that I didn’t doze off for just a moment but it is morning.
As she drifts into the land of subconsciousness, her life and dreams float by on the clouds of white so close, yet just out of reach. Wiping the sleep from her eyes, she moves her feet firmly to the ground and takes a step into the future.
Today I am grateful for the gift of slumber and restoration that allows us to rest in yesterday and wake for the new day.

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