Gratitude Journal – Day 272 – March 31, 2015

In the still of the night…

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I am alone, and yet I am not alone as myLord is with me day and night, never leaving my side. And it is he who gives me the strength to face each and every day with a heart of peace and understanding.

With the doors to Margaritaville flung wide open on this glorious Spring evening, after the rainy days and before the onslaught of pollen, I walk onto the deck which is sprinkled with sand and times gone by from beaches afar… I see the reflections of lights from houses across the lake and wonder if they can see ours just the same. I hold my breath, close my eyes and go back to a place in time when

myDarlin’ Robert Kenui Pope would join me for awhile. The geese honk, and we wish they would go away, a plane flies overhead, but it’s too dark to see and as a train whistles in the far distance, he says to me, ‘We’ve got a good life, don’t we baby?’

I step through the door to the deck, looking for the stars in the night sky, only to find they are masked by clouds. And as the thunder begins to roll in the distance, I reply, Yes we do myDarlin’, yes we do. I head inside to finish writing and turn in for the night, his presence lingers in Margaritaville for a bit longer as thunderstorms were always one of his favorites…

I am grateful myLord, for the strength you bestow upon me and the memories that carry me through my days and nights. But most of all, I am grateful for the promise of eternal life and that we will one day be with you in paradise.

‪#‎TrustintheLord‬ ‪#‎KeepLookingUp‬ ‪#‎MTWABP‬

Gratitude Journal – Day 271 – March 30, 2015

Rest well ….

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we often say to one another as we turn in for the evening. Yesterday was a day that I rested, not by choice but because I had no choice. I am blessed with peaceful slumber as my body regenerates.

And I dream of times gone by with myDarlin’ Robert Kenui Pope and when I awaken see this canvas I bought for him upon his retirement four years ago.

I am grateful myLord that myDarlin’ and I lived our dream every day, and that I am blessed to share his story with others.

‪#‎KeepLookingUp‬ ‪#‎MTWABP‬

Gratitude Journal – Day 270 – March 29, 2015

There’s a whole world out there…

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the lyrics to this young woman’s song rises from the iPhone to the ceiling curling down and around like smoke filling a room, only it opens the mind and heart instead of taking one’s breath away. I think of being 16 again with possibilities limited only by imagination and ambition, and know that this young woman will go far….Her outlook so fresh, yet soulful and her words ‘So just lie here and talk to me’ take me back to thousands of nights with you myDarlin’ Robert Kenui Pope as we lie in bed and talk of this wonderful world of ours, this existence we call life – knowing that we are blessed beyond compare.

Tonight I am grateful my dear Lord, for a new generation that restores my faith that there is still an abundance of good music waiting to be written. And the lyrics will dance their way from the pen into a paper journal or onto a napkin, from the fingertips to an iPad and come to life as each of the artists takes a deep breath into their hearts and exhales music sending a million stars to light the night sky.

‪#‎KeepLookingUp‬ ‪#‎MusicisLife‬ ‪#‎MTWABP‬

Gratitude Journal - Day 269 – March 28, 2015

Today….

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your Mother’s 98th birthday myDarlin’, but you already knew that didn’t you? And today, just like last year, we FaceTimed with Kona Tutu. When he asked her how old she is, with a big smile she said 89…. again! LOL! Looks like 89 is the new 39. We know that you were with her myDarlin’ giving her a heavenly hug as the salt water breeze from the ocean lightly blew through her snow white hair. And I can hear you say in a little boy’s voice after we hung up, like every year before, ‘that’s my Mommy!’

Today was a normal Saturday myDarlin’, well – except for waking up with a furry face looking at me.I I marvel at the unconditional love of dogs and think in some ways that it’s like God’s love for us. For when I opened my eyes, when the room was still dark I saw him beside me and his tail began to wag, thumping the carpet with each movement. Unconditional, with us all of the way, happy to see us regardless of how we are feeling.

Off to an introductory yoga class, to try a new method of exercise and relaxation. And the experience was a wonderful one, as we reached for the sky with the stargazer and took in breaths of sunshine into our being and exhaled our troubles. And through it, I was reminded of the necessity for us to slow down, express kindness to others and ourselves, and outwardly and upwardly show gratitude for the blessings in our lives. The scent of incense and soft sounds of flutes & harps filled the air, but I couldn’t help hear the song I’m Walking on Sunshine in my head. (but then again, I walk to the beat of a different drummer, ahem – sorry myDarlin’… bass line )

I took a photo of a wonderful chair that welcomed us as we walked into the door of one of yours and my favorite flea market & antique shops. For the exquisitely carved arms reached out to me and beckoned me to sit a spell on the soft and well-worn leather seat. I immediately went to text a photo to you and tease you about me bringing another chair home, knowing you would protest and question where this chair would find a home in our already full home. And as I realized that AT&T doesn’t offer service to heaven, I began to re-arrange our furniture in my head as you look down on me, smiling and shaking your head. I have the perfect spot myDarlin’.

We order Chinese delivery the same as before, but only for three, talking of our quilts, upcoming plans for jumping out of a perfekly good plane (that spelling’s for you myDarlin’), my sister's visit, our son’s graduation, our trip to the beach this summer and to Hawaii next. Full of food, memories, love and looking up into the future, we retire to the living room. I turn on the TV for the first time in over a month, and see movie recommendations for Robert. God’s not Dead is one of the top choices and I share with the girls that we saw this movie last year and how good it is. We assume the positions, each cuddling with a quilts or afghan as it is chilly, and begin to watch the movie. It is everything that I remember it to be. Wow….. and after they left, I sat down to write and checked my TimeHop app to see what we were doing one year ago, two, etc., etc. One year ago, you and I went to the movies to see ‘God’s not Dead’. Coincidence? Thank you for the movie recommendation myDarlin’.

And today, I am grateful for the breath of sunshine, love and hope you brought and continue to bring into each of our lives myDarlin’ Robert Kenui Pope.

‪#‎HappyBirthdayMom‬ ‪#‎KeepLookingUP‬ ‪#‎GodsNotDead‬

Gratitude Journal – Day 268 – March 27, 2015

Ohana…
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Orange… amazing…. celebration… bucket list…emotions ran high for over 500 associates representing most every department as we welcomed Desi to the store support center (SSC). A brilliant minded, orange blooded associate who chose even after receiving an advanced degree in physchology, to stay with us instead of pursuing a career in her field. And when you ask why, she would tell you that it is because of the family of Orange who support her every day no matter what challenges she faces on a personal level.

The Orange Ticket Tour, headed up by two of my co-workers, made me prouder than anything in my many years with the company to be a part of this great company. And just as in business, the orange inspires us to go above and beyond, not only fulfilling her bucket list wish, but showing her enforce how much we appreciate our front line associates.

Today, I am grateful for all of our associates, our team, our family as I know that we are blessed to work for a company who believes in and takes care of their own. Mahalo Desi! It’s Good to be Orange!

#KeepCalmandLiveOrange #ItsGoodtobeOrange

Gratitude Journal – Day 267 – March 26, 2015

Follow your heart….

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for it knows the way. Take a deep breath into your heart; now hold him for as long as you possibly can, then slowly exhale stars into the night sky. And just like that myDarlin’, you became the bright star in the sky that will always shower those you loved with aloha.

Just as you showered me with love every day we spent together on this big blue and green ball we call our temporary home, you continue to send hearts in subtle and not so subtle ways. And my gift to you on your birthday was the heart tattoo, with a bit of you that will remain with me for the remainder of my days.

And it seemed only fitting to take some of life’s small little treasures and have her fashion a piece of funky jewelry in the image of my tattoo of you.
- the skeleton key that opened my Grandfather’s door so many years ago represents that love is the key to happiness
- the wave guitar pick from your collection wrapped with the pewter heart she gave me to hold when I am missing you, represents music, water and love - the elements of our life
- the earring, one to my favorite pair was alone after you left and represents one….the loneliest number… and after I sent it away to be added to my necklace, I found the other under your nightstand and it will always represent the missing link to the pair of us
- the fleur de lis for your beloved Saints (yes, it was better than adding a football charm… LOL!) represents your unfailing loyalty based on love through thick and thin…
- the diamond shaped earring with the black teardrop represents the sorrow of missing you for the rest of my days, and even when it begins to fade, you will always be with me
- the faces of time represent the eternity in which our love lingers
- the two black beads from a necklace that broke and fell like raindrops to the ground, each one bouncing repeatedly until coming to a rest in a puddle, represent picking up the pieces and moving on even if one feels broken
- and finally the stick pin belonging to my Mother who you’ve reunited with, represents taking the leap of faith into the future knowing that we can trust in the Lord to guide and light the way.

And love is what wraps this heart together as it hangs from a leather cord like a swing on the moon. Yes, myDarlin’, I will wear this necklace next to you, next to my heart.

Today myLord, I am grateful for the gift of love you sent to myDarlin’ Robert Kenui Pope and me all of those years ago. For only you could have known that we were the perfect fit for one another. Mahalo my sweet Lord.

‪#‎KeepLookingUp‬ ‪#‎TrustintheLord‬ ‪#‎AllYouNeedisLove‬

Gratitude Journal – Day 266 – March 25, 2015

What to wear…

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alarming right? I hear dogs barking… and now chimes? I inhale slowly, and open one eye …. I see flowers…exhale …….. wait! where are those dogs coming from? My alarm! Eyes wide open, two really big red flowers on a slate grey wall, yikes! I am late… Jumping in the shower (not literally because that would not only be silly, but a bit dangerous… LOL!), I think about the few times you were late myDarlin’ Robert Kenui Pope. I would rush to get your clothes ready while you took a shower. A quick kiss and you were out the door.

And here I stand for what seems like an eternity in slow motion, dripping wet with a Hawaii beach towel wrapped around me in front of a closet full of way too many choices thinking that I don’t have a thing to wear. Not quite sure how I wound up with this funky outfit on, but I did OK I think as I clasp a big necklace around my neck. Before I run out for the day, I open the window for you myDarlin’ and head out the door.

Today’s email came from a dear friend and brought all of this into perspective….
As God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved; clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Colossians 3:12

And the thoughts about today’s verse read: There is a set of clothing that is always in style. It is from the ultimate designer’s collection called character and is sometimes difficult to wear. But rest assured that it is always a blessing to be decked out in His wardrobe.

Today myLord, I am grateful for the blessings of your grace and beauty that surrounds me every step of my journey. And I see the blooming tree on the road to work this morning and know that God gives each one of us the perfect clothing to wear if we’ll just put it on.

‪#‎KeepLookingUp‬ ‪#‎MTWABP‬ ‪#‎What2Wear‬

Gratitude Journal – Day 265 – March 24, 2015

Success!

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What does it mean to you? Is it setting a goal and achieving it? Is it having the most toys? Is it status? Or is it, just being content with what you have and where you are in life?

Make no mistake that hard work is the root of so much of the success we achieve in life. And for myDarlin’ Robert Kenui Pope and me, success was and is truly about trust, communication and flexibility. On the road to success often comes failures or disappointment, which must be treated as if we tripped and fell for just a moment.

And when we are down, the only thing to do is look up and trust that He is there for us, talk it out and learn how to do it better the next time. The sweetest part of success in a relationship and in life is sharing it with those you love, as it multiplies itself exponentially.

Then there is this realm of life called work…. and I am one of the many that love their job. We set goals, we work hard and we celebrate our success by sharing with all of the associates. As we gathered to celebrate the success of the previous year, I open the bag of bacon cheddar popcorn, look up to the heavens and give thanks for the blessings in my life and think to myself, it’s good to be Orange!

Today I am filled with gratitude for the successes in my life. A wonderful Ohana, a great job and the most beautiful love story I could ever have imagined…..

‪#‎KeepLookingUp‬ ‪#‎ItsGoodtobeOrange‬

Gratitude Journal – Day 264 – March 23, 2015

Makeup assignment….

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No, I’m not going to beauty school. Reasons why I didn’t post my journal yesterday.
1. My dog ate my homework? That only works with real paper and, well – if one has a dog….
2. I didn’t have anything to write about? Silly, there’s always something to be grateful for if you just look up.
3. I got home late and my computer auto-started an update that took a long, long time when I turned it on? Ding, ding, ding!

And so here I sit in the morning, writing what should have been yesterday’s journal. It shouldn’t be too difficult as I can see clearly now the rain has gone.

I look back at what was going one year ago, two years ago, three years ago and I remind myself that of how blessed I am, we are, our Ohana is to have had you in our lives and that one day again soon we will all see each other again. For this life on earth is but a breath, a vapor; a grain of sand on the beach; a drop of water in the ocean; a moment in eternity.

And yesterday myDarlin’ Robert Kenui Pope, was filled with planning, family and Ohana. I remember you sending me your schedule for the week, as you were counting down to what would be a huge celebration for our son as he graduates late this spring and your retirement (OK – the second one). Malama pono you replied after careful thought when we ordered his senior ring – and it has become his mantra for life. And we will travel to be with him as he turns the page to reveal his next journey in life.

We gathered yesterday to celebrate her birthday with a tiramisu cake and candles that keep coming back, that are so hard to blow out. And the children laughed as they took another big breath and tried again. Even though the raindrops fell softly outside of the four walls, love abounded inside as our young grandson summoned everyone together for a Georgia group hug.

I read over my journal from two years ago as you were at two weeks post-surgery, and it went something like this….
Awakened by the thunder in the middle of the night, Robert went to the bedroom window to take a look. I stir as he returns to bed, and he said it’s been going on for some time now… He also tells me that he wants to go to church this morning. I take a look at the weather channel and hope that the rain will subside before we need to go. I set my alarm to ensure we get up in time and let the sound of the rain and the comfort of knowing he is by my side send me back to sleep. I can feel him looking at me, and open my eyes to see him lying on his side smiling at me…. I love this man, and celebrate this small step of being able to lie on his side if only for a bit….

That day, I shared the miracle of your recovery with the congregation and they rejoiced with us.

Two years ago, I concluded my journal with this. ‘We are so blessed, knowing that the rain brings flowers, and so it is with life.’ Today, I am filled with gratitude for God’s gift of rain and the life it brings tomorrow.

‪#‎KeepLookingUp‬ ‪#‎MTWABP‬

Gratitude Journal – Day 263 – March 22, 2015

Railroad cars….

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the rhythmic click clack click clack…. was that what he was drawn to? And this man, myDarlin’ Robert Kenui Pope, loved trains and the rails. Was it a romantic notion of riding the rails? Or is it that the railroads connect this land of ours like none other can, like rivers to the sea, the train cars carry their cargo along the rails to their destiny. 
Rails run deep in our family for it was while working for competing railroad companies that my parents met in Chicago at the Fred Astaire Dance Studio. Romantic notions, melodies, rhythm dancing….I’ll never forget the sweet sound of the Santé Fe train engine music box, and wonder what ever became of it.

And as I write, eyes closed, I can hear the band playing on the patio when the oh so familiar ding, ding, ding and red flashing lights alert pedestrians and drivers alike that the train is getting near. Then long before one can see the train rounding the bend, the click, clack, click, clack fills the atmosphere… The conductor waves at the children lining the pation wall and pulls his whistle as the train whizzes by. I look at myDarlin’ only to see him close his eyes and smile that big smile of his. And I wonder again… what is it that he loves so dearly about the trains….

Camera and props in hand, we make our way about the square taking advantage of so many photo ops as they prepare to announce their love and intentions to live happily ever after to their family and friends. I can’t help but think of my Father and myDarlin’ as I look at him, knowing that he loves trains every bit as much as they. And then it happened…. The familiar ding, ding, ding, red lights flashing followed by the inevitable click, clack, click, clack. Hurry we say, let’s get this shot… and I watch the oh so familiar smile, the same as myDarlin’s, come over his face and he cannot help but turn to look at the train. She smiles at him, and leans her head on his shoulder….

Today I am filled with gratitude for the connectivity the railroads represent and the heartbeat of the click, clack, click, clack….And if we stay on the railroad tracks of life, it will surely take us to our destination.

‪#‎KeepLookingUp‬ ‪#‎TrustintheLord‬ ‪#‎MTWABP

Gratitude Journal – Day 262 – March 21, 2015

Balance…..

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Balancing work – life, it’s all an act right? On the tightrope of life, we balance our priorities every day. I think of one of myDarlin’ and my quotes we lived by – work hard, play hard and know it to still be true.

Today was a play day for me and I made my way about town, as has been my ritual so many Saturdays before. Exploring familiar streets and buildings is surreal as I know that I have been there before, but yet everything has changed with new businesses taking the place of ones I had grown to know and love. And it is strangely similar to my life as I make my way through the experiences that fill my day; familiar to the touch yet a different feeling.

I walked through a familiar doorway, only to find a new world before my eyes waiting to be discovered. Dish towels and plaques with catchy sayings, clothes with a unique edge, jewelry to garden gnomes; so much to take in. As I walked towards the back of the store, wanting to find every nook and cranny, I saw it, a plaque that says, ‘When life gives you scraps, make a quilt.’ I shared the story of the 13 quilts with her and watched a tear come to her eye. Then, as I paused to let silence have a chance to breathe, I heard it…. ‘Somewhere over the rainbow’ by Brother Iz softly played in the background and I knew that myDarlin’ was with me.

I walked alongside the other shoppers and Saturday afternoon meanderers down the sidewalk and entered through the doors of a shoppe myDarlin’ and I had walked through a year ago. Large, handcrafted furniture rests on the well-worn plank flooring inviting one to sit and stay a spell. The young man shared a bit about the merchandise with me, including the large hand cut wooden letters, and then also mentioned that the sheets for sale are to benefit YWAM, a missions organization with whom he is affiliated. And when I asked him to share a bit more about the missions with me, he mentioned that the training takes place in Kona, Hawaii. Remember that coincidence is only God being anonymous. Time stood still as we talked of Kona, beaches, volcanoes and God. And as myDarlin’ Robert Kenui Pope and I walked out of those same doors last year, we carried our purchase of four large hand cut wooden letters…. K-O-N-A

And tomorrow I am blessed to go to work, not only to fund the fun, but to make a difference in the lives of others. Today I am filled with gratitude that God is the balance for me between work and play, and as long as I hold onto him, I will not lose my balance on this tightrope called life.

‪#‎KeepLookingUp‬ ‪#‎MTWABP‬ ‪#‎WorkHardPlayHard‬

Gratitude Journal – Day 261 – March 20, 2015

Time Hopping…

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As I ponder how much I have to be grateful for, I scroll through the Timehop app of yesteryear and find a poignant post from two years ago as myDarlin’Robert Kenui Pope was recovering from his open heart surgery.

Every day the bouquet loses more petals, myDarlin’ is one day further down the road to recovery. And at the end of the day, we give thanks for our wonderful Ohana and the chance to explore the future together.

And just as we beheld the beauty of the fallen petal, perfectly designed by our Lord, we were grateful for the gift of life every single passing day.

‪#‎KeepLookingUp‬

Gratitude Journal – Day 260 – March 19, 2015

Lucky……

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Getting ready this morning, I was fretting (a little musical humor for you myDarlin’ Robert Kenui Pope) about not having enough time to write this entry late last night or this morning. Life is so real at times when I am rushing about to meet my daily obligations, and then in an instant, in a moment, I am thrown into a slow motion world filled with blue skies, aqua seas and fine white sand brought to me from you with a simple song….

Do you hear me,
I'm talking to you
Across the water across the deep blue ocean
Under the open sky, oh my, baby I'm trying
Boy I hear you in my dreams
I feel your whisper across the sea
I keep you with me in my heart
You make it easier when life gets hard

I'm lucky I'm in love with my best friend
Lucky to have been where I have been
Lucky to be coming home again
They don't know how long it takes
Waiting for a love like this

Every time we say goodbye
I wish we had one more kiss
I'll wait for you I promise you, I will
Lucky we're in love in every way
Lucky to have stayed where we have stayed
Lucky to be coming home someday

And so I'm sailing through the sea
To an island where we'll meet
You'll hear the music fill the air
you'll put a flower in my hair
Though the breezes through the trees
Move so pretty you're all I see
As the world keeps spinning round
You hold me right here right now

I'm lucky we're in love in every way
Lucky to have stayed where we have stayed
Lucky to be coming home someday

Today I am filled with gratitude that all I have to do is close my eyes, hear a song, see a photo or video to feel your presence. Until the day I come home to be with you, I will follow His footsteps on the beach.
‪#‎KeepLookingUp‬ ‪#‎TrustintheLord‬ ‪#‎LuckyinLove‬

Gratitude Journal – Day 259 – March 18, 2015

And she has….

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a JOB myDarlin’ Robert Kenui Pope exclaimed when he told his friend about me. I am so fortunate to work for one of the best companies ever founded on a set of core values that match my own. And so this post will be short as I am headed to work to make the donuts…. (metaphorically speaking of course!).

As I head off to the managers meeting today, I am filled with gratitude for all of our store managers as they lead an army of orange that touch many lives including our associates and our customers.

‪#‎KeepCalmandLiveOrange‬ ‪#‎KeepLookingUp‬ ‪#‎MTWABP‬

Gratitude Journal – Day 258 – March 17, 2015

Start by starting…..

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Ever say a word so much that it’s hard to remember what it actually means? They (yes, the proverbial they) say that it’s about the journey, not the destination and yet the journey cannot come to pass without starting. And somehow this seems different in so many ways.

This isn’t the quick start guide that comes with a new device to introduce you to the most commonly used features. This start deserves time, time to accept and learn.

The card says start by starting and I am starting to:
- learn what this journey looks like without myDarlin’ Robert Kenui Pope by my side every day
- realize that I am much stronger than I ever imagined
- continue loving the music – it never stops
- face each day without fear
- take on new challenges
- know that my journey can help others to see the hope of every new day

And I am not alone at the starting line…. My Ohana is right here with me, and together we cherish his memory and the lessons we’ve learned, knowing that his love lives on forever.

My Lord, today I am grateful that you are with me each step of the way as I start on this journey called life.

‪#‎KeepLookingUp‬ ‪#‎MTWABP‬

Gratitude Journal – Day 257 – March 16, 2015

The promise…

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represented by our rings myDarlin’ Robert Kenui Pope, no beginning, no ending… the circle unbroken. And we all gathered, this new formation of our Ohana here in this realm we call life while you and he look down with love from the heavens. She brought to me a gift of tulips in a fish bowl, where the roots, the bulbs, the stems and the flowers are exposed for all to see.

Contrary to what we’ve always thought to be true, these flowers from God grow in the absence of soil, but reach deep into the depths of water; the very sustenance of life. Entering the dark room, the faintest of light shines through the window from Margaritaville onto the petals reaching towards the sky and I know that even in what seems to be the darkest hour, his light and the promise of spring prevails.

Today I am grateful for myDarlin’s love, for His love and the love of our Ohana, for all are just as Spring as we move through the seasons of our lives.

‪#‎KeepLookingUp‬ ‪#‎MTWABP‬ ‪#‎TrustintheLord‬

Gratitude Journal – Day 256 – March 15, 2015

Leilani

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….from the shelf in a thrift store thousands of miles from home, to her very own lounge, to sending her kieki (children) to Hawaii to fly the skies above the volcanoes of the Big Island – she really has made a huge difference in our lives and that of others.

myDarlin’ Robert Kenui Pope and I sent Leilani’s kieki to Ohana near and far a few years ago, and his sister determined that Leilani’ would like to fly the skies along with him. And every time he flies with Paradise Helicopters, Leilani - affectionately nicknamed Hula Girl - is his trusty companion. And I know in my heart of hearts that myDarlin’ is with them witnessing the glorious sunrises, as well as the wrath of Pele as she furiously, but always gracefully sends molten lava from the mountain tops.

After a long day’s work, I snapped a photo in the parking deck and tagged it ‪#‎GoodNiteHomer‬ ‪#‎KeepLookingUp‬, then made my way out into the brisk evening air wondering if the calendar I had ordered the week before arrived. Coming around the corner I saw the Saints flag whipping in the wind, and spied the envelope set against the front door. Excitedly, I opened the envelope and pulled out the autographed calendar, only to realize that there were other items with it. And I held in my hands two beautiful prints of photos I had seen of Leilani on his page.

In Leilani’s Aloha Lounge we prepared items for the silent auction just a week ago today, and it felt right as we walked about on the grass carpeting that myDarlin’ so carefully laid years prior; the carpeting that had the honor of so many footsteps of our Ohana over the years. I gathered the Leilani’s Aloha Lounge t-shirts that our support team would wear at the benefit so that we were easily identified, and she asked, ‘just who is Leilani?’ I told her Leilani’s story, and she nodded in understanding and smiled as she chose her shirt. And when I looked out from the stage, I knew that myDarlin’ was smiling with me as I saw so many Leilani’s tie dye shirts. As we were walking out after a long, but successful event, a young lady stopped me to ask where ‘Leilani’s Aloha Lounge’ is and I replied, right here in our own town and asked if she would like a shirt of her own. She slipped it over her head and a smile instantly came across her face. That’s the power of Leilani’.

In my sleepy state, I close my eyes and allow my fingertips to be guided over the keyboard by my thoughts and realize that Leilani is so much more than a hula doll, or a t-shirt or even a place. Leilani represents the union of myDarlin’s and my life. And through her we are able to share our love with you in a tangible way.

myLord, I am grateful tonight for the day we found sweet Leilani on a shelf in a thrift store and what she has represented in our lives every day since then. And whether it be wearing one of her hand tie dyed t-shirts, hanging out in her lounge or flying with her over the volcanoes – you will know and feel in an instant that Leilani’ is love and Aloha.

#KeepLookingUp ‪#‎AllYouNeedisLove‬

Gratitude Journal – Day 255 – March 14, 2015

Trench art….

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is the term that I found online when researching the three bracelets she had donated. The era is WWII and as soldiers wait in the trenches, missing their sweethearts they craft mementos for them from the coins in their pockets. And in my hand I held three of these treasures, and sincerely wish that they could tell a story…

Were they from the same soldier? Did he love her so much that he made three of these beauties for her? It’s sometimes easy to forget that 70 years ago, one just couldn’t pick up the phone to FaceTime, send a text or photo. A young man away from the one he so desperately loves, his family and the familiar surroundings of home, takes the coins from his pocket and gently rubs his fingers across them. He is a million miles away from the noisy surroundings, and as a tear falls slow motion from the corner of his eye onto the face of the coin, it explodes then settles into a glassy drop in which he sees his reflection. And he prays the soldier he sees in the reflection will once again hold his sweetheart in his arms, as he begins to connect the coins together to make her a bracelet.

She waits by the mailbox each day for the postman, for a letter from her sweetheart who seems to be a universe away. And he smiles as he hands her an envelope, one that is larger than usual. Her hands tremble as she excitedly but gently opens the flap of the envelope that over a week ago he had sealed with a kiss. She removes the letter and a loosely folded brown paper towel, and then begins to read his hand written words.

My Love, Here in the trenches, missing and loving you in the midst of my rainy, muddy world that I am not allowed to share the details of with you. And thoughts of you are what brings my heart hope and a ray of sunshine to my day. I made this bracelet as a token of my love for you. And I thought of you as I carefully cut out each figure, taking care to focus on the delicate details that take me back to times with you. Carry this with you as a sign of my love until my return. With love, your Soldier Boy

Carefully unfolding one layer, then the next and the next, she lays her eyes on this beautiful piece of jewelry that he made just for her. And as she runs her fingers over the delicate details of each figure on the coins, a tear drop falls from the corner of her eye onto the coin and burst into rays of sunshine reflecting the sky above. She smiles as she watches it settle into a glassy drop in which she sees his reflection and prays for his safe return.

I run my fingers over the bracelet, and know that I want this piece as the love and care still radiates from it. I try to keep track of the time, and it passes quickly that day – the silent auction ends at 7:00pm, and at 6:59 I rush through the doors, pen in hand to place my name on the bottom of the list with the highest bid. In slow motion I reach for the paper as he swoops it up from under my pen. I pull my iPhone out (don’t carry watches anymore) and say that I still have time, but alas it truly is 7:00pm. One word, disappointment…. I turn away, and she smiles at me as she hands me the bracelet that she had won as the highest bidder. You see, things aren’t always as they seem and we must pause to give thanks. And I love her and her thoughtfulness. Mahalo.

Today I am filled with gratitude for the gift of love that our Lord gives to us. Not only His love for us, but the gift of our capacity to love one another. A tear of joy for that love falls from the corner of my eye onto the coin, exploding into a world across the universe, and as it settles into a glassy pool I see myDarlin Robert Kenui Pope’s reflection looking back at me saying, ‘Keep looking up, every little thing’s gonna be alright.’ I love you myDarlin’.

‪#‎KeepLookingUp‬ ‪#‎AllYouNeedisLove‬ ‪#‎MTWABP‬

Gratitude Journal – Day 254 – March 12, 2015

A few years ago….

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myDarlin’ installed a motion sensor recording device on the corner of the house for what seems like the obvious reasons. Later he hung a flag to honor his beloved Saints and the light spent more time on than off because of the flag continually dancing in the wind. And within months the light went out….

And when they came to bring tables to me for the benefit, she said, ‘I have a story to tell you.’ I focused on her as she began to speak…. On June 22 last year, they were in Vegas having fun with the family being tourists. And amongst the various trinkets they bought was a pin, a pin that she had no idea would come to be so special. They learned of myDarlin’s passing that same day and mourned with all of us. She placed the rainbow colored pin gently in my hand and said; I believe this is for you. In disbelief I found myself staring at a replica of the tattoo I got on myDarlin’s birthday last year. And I recall the words I wrote:

I wear your heart on my sleeve and will keep you in my heart for now and forevermore. The bass clef represents the foundation of love you brought into my life, the treble clef - the music you gave to me and so many others, and the hibiscus – the spirit of Aloha that surrounded you with every breath.

I pull Tacoma, loaded with tables (so lovingly brought to me by our friends), into the drive after the event, your beloved Saints flag, now tattered and torn, begins a dance as if happy to see us. And then much to my surprise and delight, the light turns on after years of being off and the motion sensor moves it back and forth as if waving to me….. Aloha myDarlin’ I say aloud as I look to the starry sky. Mahalo nui for the heart.

Today I am filled with gratitude for the love of our Lord, myDarlin’ and our Ohana. I am thankful that even in your physical absence, you continue to bring hearts to me myDarlin’ Robert Kenui Pope. And I will keep looking up for all of my days as you left the light on for me to find my way.

‪#‎KeepLookingUp‬ ‪#‎MusicisLife‬